the hell

 what

how is this still here

Ask Us Everything

JOURNALISTS: We don't have time for you. Please direct all your questions for the France here. We might reply in the future.

Also: Google and Blogger might be killing this site. We gotta work out an answer. There are still some multiple days of Christmas to celebrate.

No Christmas for John Quays

Our talent is only eclipsed by our humility. We recognize we can't always be awesome, or great, or even listenable. Once or twice the France has truly erred. Our cover of the Fall's "No Christmas for John Quays" is proof.

It's 1999, the tail end of the pre-Griggs four-piece days. We've done one recording session, a homemade four-track deal at Phil Horan and Robbie Beers' house. The songs don't sound so hot so we do nothing with them. Kindercore asks us to do a song for their second Christmas compilation. We say sure thing and promptly do nothing until the night before it's due. The four of us huddle into Jon Croxton's bedroom on Reese Street and quickly tear through the worst Fall cover ever committed to tape. We think it's funny to do an incompetent twee-pop rendition of such a loud, sneering, overbearing song. For the first and last time, the France is wrong.

To sum it up: we were lazy, we had no idea what we were doing, and the idea was a bad one to begin with. That'll be the name of our eventual career retrospective. The only good things are both ruined by the horrible production. Elise Jensen and DJ have a fine trumpet-and-guitar duet at the end undermined by the lo-fi fuzz of a level-blown cassette four-track. The final product was deemed unfit for American consumption, and only released as a bonus track on the Japanese reissue of Kindercore's first Christmas album, Christmas in Stereo. It was the first song ever officially released by Je Suis France. It's absolutely horrible.

This post doesn't deserve an image.

DOWNLOAD

JSF EP: Stoking the Storm (Gypsy Blood)

Crog recorded Stoking the Storm (Gypsy Blood) during a hurricane in Miami in 2004. His tale will harrow you. One of these songs wound up on Afrikan Majik a few years later, and at least two more maybe should have. This was the third or fourth (ACTUALLY THE FIFTH - ed.) cd-r we put out on mostly fake label Nokahoma.

1. Badlands (Springsteen)
2. The Mariner's Compass
3. Xenia, Ohio
4. Adventure in Contentment
5. Feeder Band
6. Squall!!
7. Low Rider (War)
8. Jesus Loves Me
9. The Goldheart Mountaintop Queen Directory (Pollard)

Click to Download

The Li'lest Angel

Not every song we do is great. Sometimes they are awesome instead. Like "The Li'lest Angel", a Christmas classic we made on Oglethorpe next to that Pizza Hut. It got rejected by a label that promptly got rejected by existence. Later it appeared on God's Cake, which will be reposted soon. This is one of the days that are a part of JE SUIS FRANCE'S MULTIPLE DAYS OF CHRISTMAS.

UPDATE: OH YES: close friend, France audiobiographer, and all-around ultimate man GREG VAGEN played space guitar on "The Li'lest Angel". He makes our world a better place.

france imposter on twitter

We don't know who "Beef Street" on Twitter is, but it is definitely not us. Please ignore them.

UPDATE: Okay it definitely is us. Feel free to follow us again. We know good words.

We've Felt Joy

It Is JE SUIS FRANCE'S MULTIPLE DAYS OF CHRISTMAS. We've done songs about holidays and starting today we will post them from now until we have run out of the songs for posting.

This song is "Baby Please Don't Get Stoned (It's Christmas) and it's about an Italian donkey.

Download it here, and also watch a video.

we are also in other bands: Reports on the radio tonight

I am also in this band Reports. We are awesome. We are playing on Harvard's radio station tonight at 10 PM. You can listen here or at 95.3 FM if you are in Boston. Feel free to pay attention, unless you're afraid of falling in love.

UPDATE: You can download an MP3 of the whole thing here.

"In God's Country" cover from unreleased Paste compilation

We're not ashamed to admit we like U2. We're also not ashamed to admit that some of us live or have lived in Atlanta. A few years ago the Atlanta-based pop culture magazine Paste asked us to contribute to a U2 tribute compilation they were putting together. The Georgia contingent did a fine job on "In God's Country", U2's tribute to the Florida panhandle. The comp never came out, but you can now download our cover all you want. Jeff, OJ, Ice, Jeremy, and Ken totally hooked this one.

more us to listen to

Sloan Simpson is the premier chronicler of contemporary Athens music, and his latest post at Southern Shelter features our September show at the Caledonia. This is from the Kindercore / Owl Scooters Hootenanny thing, and hopefully more mp3s from those shows will make it online soon.

Enjoying the Lack of Each Other's Company

We're busy men, too busy for one town. It takes at least six towns to handle our productivity. We don't see each other too much outside of dreams and prophetic visions, but we converse daily, and collaborate always. Occasionally a handful of us convene in one location and perform music in such sweet synchronicity that the blind would be forgiven for believing us to be a single individual. Of course it's easy to forgive the blind. Tonight almost all of the France shall congregate at the Caledonia Lounge in Athens, Georgia, as a part of the Kindercore Records / Owl Scooters Hootenanny. We'll be unveiling our brand new release The France Plays With Itself Volume 1: Shitcraft, which can also be downloaded right now at the immediately proceeding link. You can also click this link, if you'd like. But not this one. The France Plays With Itself is a new non reoccurring series of releases in which members tell each other via email what notes to play and words to sing without specifying tempo, time signature, or any other musical terms we never bothered to learn. The track listing is as follows:

1. I'll See You Later
2. Wish He'd Had More Time To Speak With Aaliyah
3. Why So Clean?
4. The Nissan Cube
5. You Take Too Long
6. Shit Sock Soon

All music by Je Suis France, and soon to be used without permission by Nylon Magazine, probably.
Artwork by The Shark.

Horsehunters EP

HORSEHUNTERS

music we made: SAs Stones

SAs Stones

this was '06, one of us had stones, the rest sang about them. like Gordon Lightfoot, our stock in trade was as much hard-eyed, dispassionate observation as romance or poetic whimsy. we will punish you with romantic whimsicality.

this thing is less dead than before

'010 is a year for the France
'09 too
we don't make music, we reveal truths
like with PALS
a new ep entirely by SA
he's a pro

Break-ups!

Spring is here and love is in the air! Right?

HA! Not so fast, Romeo. (record scratch) Ouch! What's up!? Maybe those of y'all living in La-La Land or New York are happily in love, but out in Tinseltown springtime is now Splitstime!



Whoa Nelly!




It's official! Hollywood's silver screen couple are biting the cake. That's right! Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson's marriage is now buried with the horses. D-I-V-O-R-C-E. Our insiders say that Jessica couldn't take anymore of Tony's wild wild nights on the phone. "Ring Ring, Can you hear me now?" UH OH! Insiders also indicate that Tony was getting all tired of having to hangout with her. Time to recycle the trash!

You know what they say...why hangout with the cow if ya got your own house! So word.

Don't forget - Ya heard it here first!



DOUBLE DRIBBLE!




Ok, I know what you're thinking, "I thought they were in love!!!" Nope! Looks like Angelina finally decided it was time to curb Jack Black cause our sources say Angelina was seen at the grocery store yesterday and she was flying as solo as a bird without a partner. Insiders believe Angelina got pissed when JB told the French people she was pregnant. No one is sure if she broke it off because she's nervous about becoming a mother or the fact that the baby is giving her a serious beer-belly. One thing is for sure though, these two are Brooks ass Dunn. Hit the road Jack! These boots are made for single motherhood struggles! Ya heard it here first!



Slippery & Wet!




Rock of Love? More like Rock of Not! Ohhhh, punch to the heart! That's right folks, Poison may be known for their hit song "Let's Give Love a Bad Name" but it's their lead hunkface's lovelife that's getting all the attention now. Poison told our insiders yesterday that Brett is getting back together with the boys in the band. Wild Thing! Sorry all you girls looking for true love, looks like the world's most motorcycle man is back with the wildpack. Lock-up those Coronas, "Me Thirsty"! The Break-up highway is best traveled on a bus that says "F-ing Poison" on the side! Vroom Vroom! Ya heard it here first!

Twilight Delirium 2000

Twilight Delirium 2000
Recorded somewhere in 2000
in Athens, Georgia

1. Memorial Day
2. Attention Young Squires
3. Forklift Rodeo
4. Lives in Museums
5. Outdoor Industry / Flip-Scolded
6. Release the Tucson Killer
7. Hammock
8. Memorial Day

recorded by Pubes Kevin in 2000
at Hi-Fi Mastodon's house
in Athens
Georgia

the night of the race

Songs I know better than to like, but do anyways

The other contributors to this blog have joshed me for years about my terrible taste in music. I think it's all subjective, but I will readily admit that a few days spent exclusively listening to my collection of records and CDs would drive the average man insane (unless you catch me in a good period, like when I re-purchased Run D.M.C.'s "Raising Hell" a few weeks ago). But, even I have my limits. I knew that my shit was starting to slip recently when I heard these jams on my way to and fro the ATL. I know I shouldn't like these songs, but they seem to do something special for me when I hear them:
1. Powerman 5000 "When Worlds Collide": Prior to this year's NFL draft, I spent an inordinate amount of time perusing Youtube looking for highlight clips of bright new prospects. Almost without exception, the assclown(s) charged with stringing together said highlight clips chose to use some gawdawful nu-metal song as the backing track. You know, like "Here Comes the Boom" or any type of Rage Against the Machine-sounding crap. This P-man 5000 song I think would work as the perfect pump-you-up, raging jock soundtrack to any sports clip, be it football, badminton, curling or whatever. Seriously, if we were eleven years old when this song came out, I don't see how we could have gotten pumped up when listening to it. I also have a special affinity for this song because our friend Christmas Faygo knows one of the dudes in the band and says that he's an alright guy.
2. Everlast "What It's Like": While most would agree that Everlast's best work was long-finished before he opted for a decidedly Jack Johnson-meets-G. Love route, I think this song is pretty good. I especially like the fact that a rich white man strumming an acoustic guitar to a backing drum machine track is telling me what it's like to sing the blues. Despite the song's inherent comedy, I find it to be relatively catchy. Almost groovy.
3. Stone Temple Pilots "Interstate Love Song": Now, this one I think I can lay a legitimate claim to actually liking because I was still a pretty young man (and a STP fan) when it came out. While the STP catalog as a whole is filled with a bunch of senseless grunge garbage, this jam has always jammed me in a special way words can not describe. I heard it on 96 Rock the other day, and it brought me back to a special place. While I can't admit to being particularly overjoyed at the news that Stone Temple Pilots is reforming, I can take some pleasure in knowing that Velvet Revolver is, for all intents, dead. Plus, we're *this* much closer to finally getting a listen to that "new" Guns'N'Roses album. Fuck yeah!... I guess.